If Your TV is Bigger Than Your Bank Account...

As a retail employee, on top of being the billionaire world-traveling ladies man I am, I often see something that just pisses right the fuck off. Since my job is to fix the registers I get to see a lot of people come through all 30 lanes. All kinds of people shop at the store I’m employed at, but there are a certain kind that really just make it difficult to keep my mouth shut.

Now what I’m about to get into is kind of touchy given there are people out there truly in need of help. With the economy, there are some people who just don’t have jobs and are on some type of government program for assistance. A lot of these people are good, hard working people who are just kind of fucked right now. This is not about those people.

No, by request of a buddy of mine, this is about the leeches on society. The over-spenders, the freeloaders, the people who somehow are on food stamps, but live like kings and queens.

I never have a problem dealing with the truly needy, the legitimate ‘welfarian.’ They’ve never fought me as to what is or is not allowable by food stamps or WIC to be purchased. You could almost see the disappointment in one guys face when he had to put back an item because his baby needed diapers. 

The ones I do have a problem with are the ones who come through with their kids all decked out in the latest fashion, the mom sporting a Louis Vuitton or Coach purse, and the dad packing the groceries into a goddamn tricked out Escalade with tinted windows and $2000 rims.

These people piss me the fuck off. You know what? If you spent your welfare check on a 50” 3-D LCD TV, your car payment, your hair and clothes, and then come in to use food stamps for groceries and act like we’re all there to serve your ass. Well, you’re actually kind of right, but that's because we have mother-fucking jobs. We are there to serve you, but I don’t want to because you don’t deserve it.

We have these government programs in place, to help those who are down and out, unable to find work or unable to work at all. They are not there for people who just don’t want to work.

Also, credit cards are not free money, asshole. I don’t want to get into an argument with you about how the fourth card you’ve handed me (from the fourth different bank) can’t possibly be declined. Well yeah it can, when you don’t pay your bills they tend to not let you spend anymore. I know that’s why you have four cards, you just max them out and somehow fool someone into giving you another one.

The point here is that you have to learn to live within your means. Don’t have a job? Guess what, you probably shouldn’t be getting your hair ‘did’ every week, you shouldn’t buy that fucking TV and you should be looking for a goddamn job instead of sitting on your ass playing the latest Call of Mother-fucking Duty. I don’t have a problem helping people out, but show me you’re trying, show society you aren’t just enjoying this free ride as long as you can.

Let’s put it this way. Look around you for a second. If you that aforementioned 50” 3-D LCD TV mounted on your wall, and you don’t have a fucking couch? You might need to get your priorities in line. Take the remote control to that TV and shove it up your ass, sideways - because you owe me money, bitch.